I used to have this reoccurring nightmare that the world was coming to an end and there were zombies involved. I would be running away from the zombies and I would have to pick who to hide from them with. My friends in North Carolina or my family in Pittsburgh.
This dream stemmed from my love/hate relationship with the film 28 Days Later.
The first time I saw 28 Days Later I went with Amy Smith and I was a senior in high school. My parents were out of town and I insisted on sleeping at her house that entire weekend in fear that I would be infected with The Rage if I slept alone at Inglewood Dr.
Perhaps that is how this film became a catalyst in my anxieties as to where home is. In this dream I would find myself with one or the other, friends or family and whomever I was without I would miss. Am I supposed to spend my time on this soon to be demolished earth with my friends whom I love like family or my family whom I am lucky enough to often love like friends?
I now wake up (on the floor) thankful that the dream I had about the earthquake was only a dream. In my new reoccurring nightmare I am stuck in an earthquake. I either get trapped in my apartment and cannot leave or I am in my car and I do not know how to handle the situation. In both cases, I am alone.
Home is no longer two different places. But one giant, glorious place called the US of A. I now feel as if I could live anywhere in that country and feel like I am home. I am hoping I can get to that one place I call home this summer, but I have never dished out that amount of money for anything ....
I did happen to catch my niece Caroline when I rang my mother at my midnight and her noon. Caroline put down her own bag of chips and got on the phone to tell me, in her best Pearl the Landlord voice, "Come to my house. Eat chips."
At that moment, I was pretty sold on the idea of spending my life savings to eat some Pringles in the suburbs.
When Caroline and I got off the phone, her mother explained that "Aunt Caity is far away. Like Dora."